Another example of my business communication “stylings”

Life doesn’t always go the way you want it to go. Sometimes you make plans that go asunder, sometimes you make no plans and succeed fabulously, and sometimes you have to scramble at the last moment to do something, say, give away tickets to a sporting event.

So take a wild guess as to this email’s theme. That’s right, gentle reader, we’re going to delve into everyone’s pre-Fourth of July subject…etymology! We’re going to explore the word “asunder.” And here, you thought this was going to be a last minute Cubs ticket giveaway! You silly gentle reader you.

The dictionary says asunder means “into parts” or “apart from each other in position.” The word derives from a Middle English word no one can pronounce, which in turn derives from an Old English word that definitely no one can pronounce because it sounds like someone burping.

So aren’t you glad for the Norman Invasion of 1066 which not only removed the usurper Harold II from the English throne and replaced him with, uh, the usurper William the Bastard, but also introduced numerous fancy, and dare I say, sensuous (or sensual? I can never remember which is which) sounding French words into the guttural lowland German the Angles, Saxons, and Jutes spoke. Yes, you are glad. Trust me. You are very glad.

Further, you are very glad that for reasons unknown, Middle English segued into Modern English due to a strange phenomenon. No, this strange phenomenon was not Phish it was the Great Vowel Shift. For some strange and off-putting reason, people began changing the way they pronounce vowels. This must have been strange and off-putting to intelligent, educated, right thinking people of the time. You know, like, kind of like what, you know, like you experience, like today, if you like spend an hour or two in like Schaumburg.

Anyway, what does all this miscellaneous and odd bits of info mean? Hmmmm… I guess you could say this odd lot assortment of facts qualifies as sundry bits of info. And “sundry,” ladies and gentlemen, derives from the same guttural low land German word that brought us “asunder.”

See how things go round and round? That’s called a theme, kids.

And yes, I do have tickets to giveaway. And no, they are not for the Grateful Dead, don’t ask. I have four tickets to tomorrow’s game between the Cubs and the usurper Marlins. The game is Friday July 3, 1:20 pm start. [tickets no longer available – Ed.]

Due to the short notice of this ticket giveaway, you probably need to be downtown or otherwise be able to make it downtown to pick up the tickets. If you’re interested, shoot me an email. I’ll have one of my minions figure out the details.

And no matter what you do this weekend…have a great holiday weekend!

If you’d rather not receive emails like this, simply reply with “remove” in the subject line and I’ll take you off my list.